Single Mums

Technorati Tags: raising kids alone, single parent, single parenting, solo mom with kids

Well I made it to twenty odd days but life finally got in the way and I was unable to complete the challenge. I admit to being surprised I made it as far as I did, even if the posts I wrote weren’t all the exciting or even well written. I guess at least now I can use this blog for those time I really have something decent to say.

In case you’re wondering why I didn’t meet the challenge the last couple of days, well Friday I worked all day, got home just in time to get the kids organised for their Friday night activities then by the time I got home from that it was near midnight and I was knackered and totally forgot about it. Then yesterday I pretty much spent the day travelling to and then sitting around a basketball stadium while my daugther had her trials thingie. Mind you, not all of that travelling was necessary.

We got to my parents house to drop my other daugther off (she didn’t want to stay home with her brother all day knowing we wouldn’t let home until quite late last night) then took left on the long journey. Just before we left my parents I’d asked my daugher if she had her bball shoes and she said yes.  About half an hour into our travels my son rang (yay for mobile phones) and told us my daughter had left her basketball bag at home (with her shoes in it) so back we went. The thing is, is that that damn basketball bag never comes out of the car, she changes shoes after she gets inside a stadium and takes them off before she leaves, puts them in the bag and then the bag stays in the boot until the next game. For some unkown reason she took the bag out before we left yesterday morning while she was making sure she had enough water botttles etc and the obviously forgot all about it.

Ahh well that’s life I guess.

And now, suprise, suprise we’re about to head off to basketball again.

Technorati Tags: NaBloPoMo

So I’ve got the day off work today - well paid work that is - Instead of working for money, I’m doing twice as much and working twice as hard for free - Yep that damn housework thing.

Really I don’t know why I think I have a day off. Having spent the last hour or so scrubbing floors I know where I’d rather be - and that’s not home. I have so much to do - the washing, vacuuming and all the rest that it’s mind boggling how things can build up so quickly. I wash nearly every day, I vacuum reasonably regularly, and I clean something every day, so I have to wonder why it seems like there is so much to do.

And all that housework crap is getting done in between the telemarketers calls (how did they know I’d be home today?) and yes playing around on this computer. My damn kids got me hooked on a couple of myspace and facebook applications so I have to keep checking them (and making sure I’m ahead of the kids)

And to top it all off I have an online training course I have to find time to do between now and next week. I really should be doing it all today cause the weekend is going to be busy (Full day state team try outs for one of the kids) and I’m generally too tired etc to do it in the evenings. I just can’t be bothered.

Technorati Tags: housework

It’s been one of those days. All I can say is it’s good to be home. I ended up working way longer than expected and now I’m absolutely knackered. To the point where I bought Pizza on the way home ’cause I just knew I wouldn’t feel like cooking once I got home.

So now I’m scarfing that down while I’m typing this out - ‘ cause I just know the minute I go out into the lounge room to even think about watching tv I’ll fall asleep.

The thing is though that I’m waiting for a phone call - I’m hoping it comes sooner rather than later this evening, otherwise I’ll have fallen asleep and will probably make no sense at all when/if I’m talking on the phone.

As for right now, I’m gonna finish this last bit of garlic break and see if I can pull a guilt trip on the kids and get them to do a littly tidy/dishes thing for me - my feet just don’t want to hold me up anymore

I never knew just how boring my life probably is until I attempted this challenge. Day in day out it seems that nothing of any interest happens to me.

Yes being a mum of three teenage kids and working means I’m kept incredibly busy, but that’s pretty much my life in a nutshell. I go take kids to school, go to work, pick kids up from school, take kids to whatever after school activity is on depending on what day of the week it is, come home, feed kids, go to bed and start all over again the next day. The only slight variation to this is the weekends when every second saturday I don’t work and don’t take the kids to school and Sundays when there’s no work or school. But I still run kids to their chosen sporting activity etc.

That’s it though.

I haven’t been out with my mates in I don’t know how long - the kids have a much more active social life than what I do. I very rarely go shopping to get something just for myself - in fact the last time I bought myself something new was when I was getting new school shoes for the kids and noticed I could get some cheap pants for work.

I haven’t even had a night on my own for months - I don’t even care if I just stay home - without the kids means I can watch what I want on tv and not have to have the volume up full bore just to hear over them. I can eat what I want when I feel like it, rather than eating cause the kids are telling me they’re starving and can’t wait any longer for tea (that of course is after they’ve eaten everything in site when they get home from school etc)

Don’t get me wrong - in some cases I treat the kids sporting activities as my social events - I have some good friends among the other parents so those nights that I’m sitting there while they’re training could be classed as a time out for me - and I do enjoy it - but it would be nice to catch up with my mates.

I was only thinking about that on the way home from work today - of all my friends that I grew up with most of whom I’ve known for 30 odd years now - there are only a few that are married and have kids., Many of them are still single and ya know - listening to what they get up to - the partying every weekend etc I really don’t think I could do it - One I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I didn’t have my kids and two, I couldn’t handle going out and drinking etc the way they do - it’d take me all week to recover About the only thing they have that I don’t is the ability to take off at the drop of a hate without having to plan holidays etc around children.

Yes I moan and groan about being a single mum, and yes my life is as boring as hell sometimes, but I wouldn’t trade it - instead I might try to find a way to break out of this routine

I need a time out. I haven’t had a day without kids for I don’t know how long and I’m getting to that point where I just need a break. Yes I’ve had a night here or there where one or two of them have stayed overnight with their grandparents, but never all three at the same time, and even when they stay overnight I still have to run them to where ever they need to go before or after.

The thing it though, that at times it’s not just me, the three of them can only spend so much time in the same house before it becomes world war three. They can’t even talk to each other without sniping. While I’m at the point where all I really want to do is ignore it and them, I just can’t. Unfortunately they’re now too big to send for a time out (not that it ever really worked when they were little anyway) and all they do is yell at each other more. Or ask why I’m not doing anything to stop it.

All I really want is a day without the yelling, screaming and throwing of things. It’s not too much to ask is it?

I try to talk to them, I try bribing and I try laying on a guilt trip, all of which work for brief periods of time - at least until one of them looks the wrong way, touches the wrong thing etc.

I’ve got an early start for work tomorrow, so I’m thinking I may just go to bed now and let them sort themselves out. As long as the police or ambulance aren’t called I’ll be happy.

Technorati Tags: disicpline, single parent, time out

Wow. I’ve made it to half way in the NaBloPoMo - which has really surprised me, I didn’t think I’d make it this far with a post a day - okay yes, some of those posts aren’t real good,but at least I was able to put finger to keyboard on a daily basis, so that’s gotta mean something.

At the moment it’s just me and one child home, my son is at work and my other daughter is with her dad, though she will be home shortly. He just rang to let me know he’s gotta bring her home because she has a migraine (all three of my kids suffer from them. One gets them quite regularly the others only every now and then, but when they do get them it means vomiting, pain and a not pleasant experience)

Today has been pretty much the usual stuff, running kids around etc but today there was something a little different.

While I was heading down to pick my daughter up from her grandparents to take her to basketball I nearly had a car accident while trying to avoid a flock of ducks. Okay I have to go and double check what a group of ducks is called  Hmm well not sure that really helped…from http://www.ducks.ca/resource/general/faq/faq2.html#group

There are several different terms used to refer to a group of ducks. Mostly, it depends on what species of ducks are in the group. Paddling, skiff, raft, team and dopping are just some of the terms used.

It also depends on whether the group is on the ground or in flight. For example, a group of mallard ducks on the ground is call a “sord”, but when in flight, it is called a “flock” (as are all ducks in flight).

Whatever they’re called I’m betting they now wish they hadn’t tried to cross the road in front of me.

Technorati Tags: kids, sport, travel

So it’s late Saturday afternoon, I’ve been at work most of the day (after another early start - and a late night last night after basketball) so I’m pretty damn tired. It’s been one of those days.

While I was at work I got a call from my son who tells me that he accidentally turned the power off to my freezer last night before we all went out - I of course didn’t notice it last night or early this morning before I left so everything defrosted - which totally sucked - not only was there water everywhere, but there’s was a few dollars worth of frozen stuff in there that now is no good at all.

Now I’m trying to organise my kids - I have two at home and one at her nanas. One wants to go down there as well - so they’ll both stay the night which means only having my son at home tonight - all that’s fine, but I need to also try and organise it so I’m covered for tomorrow. I have to get my son to his job early in the morning - then one of my daughters to her basketball training - and figure out what to do with the third child. The biggest pain of it all is the timing - my son’s job and my daughters basketball are within 5 minutes of each other but the timing means three trips there and back (a reasonable distance) one to get my son to work, come back - wait an hour or so and take my daughter to basketball, come home and then go back again late tomorrow afternoon to pick my son up. And I really want a sleep in.

Perhaps if I’m really lucky I’ll be able to talk the kid’s dad into taking my boy to his work, which means only two trips there and back for me (after picking my daughter up first from her grandparents) and a bit later start so a semi-sleep in. Here’s hoping luck is on my side and he’ll do it for me. This getting kids to and from is probably my single biggest problem with being a single mum. Expenses aside it’s just a pain trying to figure out who needs to be where at what time and how I plan my routes to get them there.

Technorati Tags: driving, Parenting, single moms, single mum

Wow I don’t know if it’s just me or not but these last few months are really flying. While most of it is probably due to how busy I’ve been at work, I think somewhere in amongst all that, time seems to be zooming on as my little man will be turning 16 in a couple of weeks and I’m having some minor adjustment problems.

It seems like only yesterday that this little 6 pounder was cuddling up with me, a tiny little thing that changed my life. Of course it wasn’t long before he was roaming around following me everywhere I went, listening to me when I talked to him and generally thinking I was the light of his life. His Mum! The one he relied on, listened to and believed in. Even though we crossed paths in those years, having the odd little tiff, he was (and still to some extent is a Mummy’s boy - as most boys tend to be)

But now? well now my little man is not so little anymore - he towers over me, outweighs me and is starting on his new path in life. While he still tells me everything (sometimes there’s somethings a mum really doesn’t need to know) and still turns to me on occasion when he needs something (aside from the usual: money, food and a chaffeur) with each passing day it seems to be a little less.

He has a part time job, so he’s not scrounging off me as much, he’ll probably have a licence within the next month so won’t need my chaffeur services as much and judging by the horde of girls that seem to be following him around I won’t be the main female in his life for much longer. Of all that’s changing though, it’s the getting of the drivers licence that’s really causing me to want time to stand still for awhile longer, I just don’t think I’m ready to have him driving himself around the place.

Ahh well I guess it has to happen sooner or later - perhaps by the time the twins turn 16 I’ll be ready for it.

As a family we don’t watch a lot of television. Partly because we’re always running around to one activity or another and partly because when we are home there’s just a whole heap of crap on. However we do have a few shows that we all like.

The problem though is that they keep messing around with the schedules. Take Heroes for example. It used to be on at 9:30 and while that’s a bit late for the girls to sit up when there’s school the next day I used to let them so they got right into watching it. But the last few weeks they’ve decided to start it at 10:30 which is way too late for them to stay up - so of course they beg and plead with me, but I don’t let them - hell it’s almost too late for me to stay up. I can’t record it for them cause our video recorder doesn’t work anymore, and even if I could afford it I don’t even know if you can buy them anymore it’s all about the dvd recorder and Tivo or whatever it is that’s hitting our shores.

Why do they do this to us? at least when there was a show on the kids watched of an evening I’d get a little peace and quite if/when we were home - well except for the commercial breaks when the kids would feel the need to run around like idiots or stir each other up.

As it is now - I have to go and give up my computer time so some homework can get done - best go and find a good book to read

Technorati Tags: books, kids, reading, tv